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"Once Upon a Time... The Tragic Tale of a Broken World"


once, i awoke with the sun
and through my open window,
cool winds carressed my face,
breezes whispering their secrets
and i heard their words.

once, i climbed the tallest mountain
And laid down on its peak
pressing my ear to its wise stone form
i listened to its story:

Once, a little boy screamed
Parents fighting
Signing papers in permanent ink
Showering him with gifts,
Trying to outdo one another.
Fighting over his attention,
But never showing love.
Leaving a $20 bill with a note-
"I'll be home late, don't wait up."
Telling lies about each other
In the name of custody.
So, Never having felt so lonely,
He puts a pistol to his head
And silently prepares to pull the trigger.
"All I ever wanted...
For you to love me, and love each other.
That's all I ever asked for."
And, through the mountain,
I heard him cry a little.

Once, a lonely girlfriend screamed.
Her welfare boyfriend,
So in love
Only wanting the best for her
Knowing she deserves the stars
And every diamond money can buy,
He knows he's not enough.
Leaving tear stains on a note-
"You deserve the world
And everything I can't afford.
You can do so much better.
So with these final words, I leave.
Goodbye, my love.  goodye."
Once, a lonly girlfriend screamed.
"All i ever wanted...
for you to love me, to love each other
That's all I ever asked for."
And through the mountain,
I heard her cry a little.

Once, a heart-broken savior cried.
A world he created
brimming with greens and reds
and all the colors of natural beauty,
torn apart by recklesness
and all "in the name of God"
everything spoiled
a washed-away note He wrote in the sand-
"Is nothing sacred anymore?"
"Holy Wars," denominations
When the message is supposed to be love.
it's bad enough to kill each other,
but do to it in My name?
why does religion leads to fighting,
and the need to prove each other wrong/
once, a heart-broken savior screamed.
"all i ever wanted...
for you to love Me, and love each other
that's all i ever asked for."
and through the mountain,
I heard Him cry a little.

Once, I felt my body tremble
and on that tall mountain ledge,
i looked toward the sky.
somewhere, a little boy's ghost listens
somewhere, a lonely ex-girlfriend listens
somewhere, a heart-broken savior listens
"all i ever wanted...
for you to love me, and love each other.
that's all i ever asked for."
and through the mountain...
i think they heard me cry a little.
full title: "Once upon a time... The Tale of a Broken World"

umm its kinda like ... part of it is metaphors and part of it is truth. this is the world. i know its long but please please please be patient and read it all. please.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconluthienferfalas:
luthienferfalas Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2008
It is amazing.....
Reply
:iconburaqina:
buraqina Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2004
Wow, great! :D You have a great style and a lot of talent :hug: Keep up the great work, this is another for my faves! :)

:blackrose: ~Buraqina
Reply
:iconvedmadetya:
VedmaDetya Featured By Owner Feb 5, 2004
wow i seriously just got chills. That was so deep and the emotion is SO strong, that was an amazing peice! You have a lot of talent!

-Vedma
Reply
:iconthe-other-molly:
The-Other-Molly Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2004
Wow...
This is rather good. You have a writting style. Mind if I print it out and show it to a friend?

Molly
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2004
of course not!! do what you want with it :) thank you very much for the compliment and comment !
:hug:
Reply
:iconcharukyraaliakaeyla:
CharukyraaliaKaeyla Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2004
Can I draw you a pic for it?
I think every poem deserves an art thingy to go with it ;)
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2004
ha... well sure you can !! *hug* thanks...
:D
Reply
:iconcharukyraaliakaeyla:
CharukyraaliaKaeyla Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2004
AWWW!!! :aww: this is AWWWWESOME!!!!! :aww: I love it!!! ^_^ I LOOVE IT!!!! :heart: I dunno if I will fav it...I might!!!
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2004
thank you!!!!!! and thank you for faving it!!!
Reply
:icontruckie:
truckie Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2004
that was really good. i enjoyed it a lot. the repetition was nice. i love it. very nice! after reading that i think i'll devwatch you! wow aren't you lucky :p
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2004
hehe
well thank you very much for the compliment and watch... i'll check out your gallery asap :D
Reply
:iconcskelm:
cskelm Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2004
this piece makes my emotions spring forth like ketchup from a packet stepped on in the cafeteria :P you are an awesome poet, don't ever try and stop the power of your imagination and your mind. keep up the awesoem work. +fav
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2004
hahahaha at this late hour when i'm incoherant, that ketchup simile made me laugh for like 5 minutes. thanks for that. thank you oh so much for the compliment, quite kind of you!! :D
Reply
:iconcskelm:
cskelm Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2004
anytime, as a matter of fact i tihnk i will comment on the rest of your art once i myself am in a more... complete... state of mind :P
Reply
:iconsuto-mu:
Suto-mu Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2004
I believe this poem was done with the beautiful, artistic nature of someone who knows no end to their creativity. I believe you wrote this poem with an understanding of the world that few have. I think this is a great poem and very glad that I read it. Thank you for making such great works of poetry.
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2004
wow, that is very very kind of you to say. thank you so much for your interest and support. that really means a lot.
Reply
:iconfirm-boy:
firm-boy Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2004
LOL there is an iguana icon..but its not of an iguana :(
Reply
:iconfirm-boy:
firm-boy Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2004
very moving poem.. i'm glad i found it.... i feel bad for not reading it sooner :)

great work :D iguana
Reply
:iconrayfan:
Rayfan Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2004   Writer
That was a very moving poem (and I don't usually like poetry much). Nice structure to it too, great work. :+fav:
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2004
why thank you very much, that means a lot!! :hug: and thanks for the :+fav: too! :D
Reply
:iconcoiler:
Coiler Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2004
really good poem. you're an awesome writer. keep it up.
oh.. and this is definately a fav!
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2004
thank ya kindly, that means a lot to me. :hug:
:rose:
Reply
:iconhangyourself:
HangYourself Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2004   Writer
That was nice. I really really really liked the ending. Delicious. And I admit, I got a little bit of jealousy goin' here. That is just.....impressive.
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2004
haha... i thought i was the jealous one! anyways... thanks :D there's no compliment better than "delicious," i suppose. hehe.
Reply
:iconqueenmeshi:
QueenMeshi Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2004
Wow, that is...wow...awesome.
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2004
wow, thank you very much. means a lot. :hug:
:rose:
Reply
:icona-girl:
a-girl Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2004   Traditional Artist
WOW!

... that's all i can say.
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2004
haha... im assuming that's a ... good thing?
if so... thanks! hehe :D :hug:
:rose:
Reply
:icondestructionist:
Destructionist Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
HOLY CRAP! :hug: It's amazing. I like it a lot, especially the 5th stanza ::is flogged:: . :+fav: !
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
why thank you very much!! that means so much to me!
:hug:
Reply
:iconthlanis-greenleaf:
Thlanis-Greenleaf Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
I too felt something In my soul stir while I read this poem. I like this alot!
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
aww why thank you so very much! very kind of you, it means a lot. :D
:hug:
Reply
:iconniennaalatariel:
NiennaAlatariel Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004   Photographer
That was really neat, I actually felt something when I read it. Good choice of words and the flow/repetition is good too.
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
thanks very much, it means a lot and thanks for the fav!! :D
:hug:
Reply
:iconniennaalatariel:
NiennaAlatariel Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004   Photographer
You're welcome. I just noticed we have the same name - Brenna, that's really weird!
Reply
:icondaylightfading:
daylightfading Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2004
!! yea i think thats why i added you at first, then i checked out your gallery and so yes yes excellent. :D
Reply
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